Jennifer Lopez Is Chubby In An Ugly Ass Bikini

Posted By: Shawn On: July 5, 2008
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I’m a complete mess right now. I’ve been laying in bed all day long dreading the moment when I had to get up to post this. I can only imagine if I had a real job like tarring roofs or something. The Simple Plan 4th of July thing was ridiculous. After the fireworks and their concert I went back to Vince Neil’s bar, Dr. Feelgood’s, and hung out with the band. I had no clue that the guys in Simple Plan all had annoying French accents and I made it a point to mention that. The lead singer guy, his name is seriously Pierre, was wearing a shirt that I almost wore but I changed at the last minute. I was thankful for that and I have since removed said shirt from my rotation. The guys were pretty cool and they were trying to get laid the entire time we were in the VIP area. Pierre kept trying to get random girls to kiss each other and he was successful on more than one occasion. Chuck, the drummer, sneaked away to a back booth with a girl who was getting paid to pole dance in the club and I’m totally convinced he got a blowjob back there. We all got wasted and they all got laid. Some people say that they will never forget September 11, 2001, others, Pearl Harbor. I will never forget how completely annoying their French Canadian accents were. Three cheers for Simple Plan and the drunken night. Fun was had by all. Meanwhile, Jennifer Lopez and her husband Marc Anthony were swimming near their yacht in Portofino, Italy.