A True Story About A Drunken Ivanka Trump

Posted By: Shawn On: June 19, 2008
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Ivanka Trump looks pretty hot in these photos snapped Tuesday night at the Whitney Contemporaries Art Party but when I used to hang out with her, not so hot. You see, her douchebag father Donald Trump lives near me in West Palm Beach, FL. When I say ‘near me‘ I mean I live in an apartment in West Palm Beach and he lives in a mansion on Palm Beach Island. His daughter Ivanka and I are the same age and we used to run with the same crowd back in the day. She knew a bunch of losers from the local Catholic school Cardinal Newman and she had her own apartment when she was like 16 years old. The apartment wasn’t anything special but I went to several keg parties there and she was always tanked.

This was back when ecstasy was big and her eyes were always in the back of her head. I’ve seen Ivanka do keg stands and all sorts of other things to try to act like her dad isn’t a super famous rich guy. I know what you’re thinking, why didn’t you bone her? Ivanka Trump wasn’t that hot back in the day. In fact, she wasn’t even mildly attractive and the chicks that I was nailing were much hotter. Sure her dad is rich and powerful but she had a mustache and an ugly face. She also had tiny boobs which have clearly been modified over the years into spectacular breasts. Anyhow, she looks hot these days and I regret not making a move because I totally could have hit that and videotaped it and leaked the tape on the Internet. Hindsight is 20/20 I guess. Ivanka, if you’re reading this, drop me a line and I’ll have sex with you immediately and then tell everyone about it.